Job Security
Am I the only person who sometimes feels bad for the husband who is depicted as clumsily taking care of his own children? This week in the comic strip For Better For Worse the mother has been out of town and dad has been home taking care of the children. As per the stereotype of this situation he doesn’t know the routine or where anything is located in the house. If I side with this guy do I have to turn in my neighborhood mommy card? Am I siding with the enemy?
I don’t know that I’m siding with him so much as cutting him some slack. Running a household is a job. The schedules, shopping, maintenance, cleaning, childcare, it’s a huge job. Ideally every home and family would have it’s own version of nanny/admin/housekeeper, but they don’t and these tasks fall to the adults in the family. So what happens when one of the adults is out of town? Why is it expected that when someone else has to do that job that they would be able to step up to the plate immediately and hit a home run? Why should we expect everything to be the same with someone else in charge?
If I had to do my spouses job I would be utterly useless, and that would be just figuring out the parking. I don’t know how to run a team, read office politics, let alone the actual brainiac work that is IT Management. So why then when I go away should I expect that he would know how to run the house like I do? And why is how I do it the right way?
Honestly, from the time I started leaving for a weekend (when the baby was two years old) I was so thrilled at the thought of not being responsible for anyone else for two whole days that I didn’t really care what I came home to. I’m happy that I have a husband who works a job that provides us with the cushion of enjoying extra things like weekends away. Sometimes I take flak for prepping the pantry, laying out snacks, putting a casserole in the fridge, or planning an activity for them before I leave. But isn’t this similar to what the teacher does for the substitute? Wouldn’t I need some direction if I had to walk into an unfamiliar building and run a business? If even for a day?
It’s my job to know that Friday is Spirit Day at school and our daughter needs to wear blue and a funny hat. It’s my job to pack a nutritious lunch and have the pantry stocked so I can do so. It’s my job to know the name, number and location of the vet. It’s my job to know where all the vital household documents are. I’m on-call if the child gets sick at school. Why is it my job? Because we talked about it before we got married. I’m a traditional gal and we decided that whoever could make the most money would work and whoever didn’t would stay home. Most of the time I’m content to do it and yet like everyone else in their job it’s a grind sometimes. I’m pretty sure though that no one else is signing up for it so it’s all mine. Gotta love job security. 